Internet dating message
I am perpetually indecisive about even the most mundane things, and I couldn’t imagine navigating such a huge life decision so quickly. Happily so—and probably more so than most people I know who had nonarranged marriages.
The first girl, he said, was “a little too tall,” and the second girl was “a little too short.” Then he met my mom. Let’s look at how I do things, maybe with a slightly less important decision, like the time I had to pick where to eat dinner in Seattle when I was on tour last year.
’ One plus side of internet dating is your friends needn’t get involved in your love life, because that’s a recipe for disaster. I’ve got the perfect guy for you — but he’s not quite ready yet.’ When I asked why not, she said: ‘Well, his wife’s not quite dead yet.’ Often, I’ve seen a guy’s photo and thought: ‘Wow! Some women I know go on these sites for the same reason men do, but that’s not my style. Most of the men I’ve met have dressed smartly — that’s probably an age thing.
’ But when you email them, you get a message back saying: ‘This man is not available.’ Or you get an email, but as soon as you ask for something like a phone number you never hear back. One friend met a gorgeous man online who said he was a TV presenter. I’m looking for someone to share dates and go to dinner parties with. Sadly, once men hit the 60 mark, they tend to go downhill a bit looks-wise. You can’t let it put you off leading a full life, though.
But that doesn’t mean that men end up standing alone in the corner of the online bar. Take Derek, a regular user of Ok Cupid who lives in New York City.
The question nagged at me—not least because of my own experiences watching promising relationships peter out over text message—so I set out on a mission.
I read dozens of studies about love, how people connect and why they do or don’t stay together.